It was a warm summer day. Not one of those hot days where you can hardly stand to be outside, but one of those warm, comfortable days that make you want to sit out on the porch with a big glass of iced tea. In fact, that’s exactly what I was doing. I’d finished my chores for the morning and was enjoying some leisurely time off dozing in my hammock on the porch. Of course, something this good couldn’t last.
“Daniel!” came the cry from inside the old farmhouse.
“What?” I yelled back annoyed.
“I need you to run some errands for me!” It was my mother calling from the kitchen.
“Why do I have to?” I asked without moving. “Can’t Jon go?”
“Because your brother is already doing what I asked him to do!” came the frustrated reply.
“Fine!” I grumbled.
Grudgingly I got out of the hammock and downed the rest of the lemon iced tea is one huge gulp. I stalked off towards the kitchen resigned to having a bad day. I opened the kitchen door and was assaulted by a blast of searing hot air. Oh, right. I remembered. It’s Tuesday. That means it’s baking day.
“There you are. Finally!” my mother exclaimed at my entrance. “I need you to run to town for some stuff.”
“What and how much?” I asked in a sing song voice.
My mother gave me a look that said more than words could. “I need three pounds of flour, a dozen eggs, and a pound of sugar.” Did I mention that my mom loves baking a little too much?
“Fine.” I said. “Can I at least take the truck?”
My mother gave me another one of those looks as she handed me some money. I guess the truck’s not an option. I thought. I spun lazily around and stumbled out of the kitchen become oven.
I went up to my room and pulled on my sneakers. I hated the idea of walking into town in these, but they were all I had. I was going to get teased for this in school. Again. I shrugged. What did it matter what other people thought anyway? I may not be a challenge for any of them (including the girls) physically, but intellectually I was an olympian among first graders. At least that’s what it felt like. If my school had any AP classes or if they would let me skip grades, I would be in college by now. I only went to school because I had to.
I took off walking down the road. It was so hot I almost thought I saw the road boiling at one point. I shook my head and attributed it to the heat messing with my head. The town was only about five minutes away by car, but walking it was at least three times that. The sun was beating down on my the whole time, but my tanned skin didn’t even register it. Living on a farm has its benefits.
I reached town without incident. Well, when I say without incident I mean without anything new. A group of seniors drove by and threw insults my way, but that’s old news. It’s been like that since my mom decided I couldn’t be home-schooled anymore. I was too smart for her to handle. I learned too fast for her to catch up. She used those excuses when she said she needed to send me to the public school. I believed those excuses, but not the solution.
I walked through the doors of the grocery store, old sneakers squeaking on the immaculate tile. My head was down, hair covering my eyes. I didn’t see anyone because I wasn’t looking. Oops. My mistake.
“Hey, boys! It’s Danny!” a voice I knew too well sounded from my left.
“How you doin’ there, Danny?” the condescending question was pointed in my direction.
“I was doing just fine, Dale.” I spat.
“Hey!” Dale said with fake hurt. “There’s no need to give me that kind of attitude.”
“You sound like my mother.” I muttered.
“What’s that?” Dale glared. “I didn’t quite catch that.”
“Oh, nothing!” I said mockingly innocent. “It was filled with big words anyway. You wouldn’t understand.”
“Are you calling me stupid?” Dale growled, grabbing me by the collar of my T-shirt. “‘Cuz if you are, it might not end so well for you, Danny-boy.”
“I wouldn’t dare call you stupid, Dale.” I said out loud. Under my breath I added, “At least not to your face. You know what that means.”
“Good call, Danny.” he said putting me back on the ground. To the rest of his gang of football-playing gorillas he said, “Let’s go, boys!”
I waited until they’d all pushed past me before fixing my T-shirt. Then I went to find the ingredients for my mother. I found them easily enough and went back to the front. As I handed the cashier the money, he started up a conversation.
“You all right there, Dan?” You’ve got to love a small town.
“Yeah.” I answered. “Happens all the time.”
“You shouldn’t let yourself get pushed around like that!” He insisted.
“Like I don’t know that, Mark!” I snapped.
“Hey, chill.” Mark said calmly. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I’ll tell you what. It’s just about the end of my shift. Why don’t I give you a ride home?”
“Nah, I’ll be fine. You don’t have to...” I waved him off.
“It’s no problem. Your house is on my way. I insist.”
“Fine.” I groaned.
Here’s a little background on how I met Mark. Not everyone at school dislikes me. Mark is the one who doesn’t. He’s a senior, just like Dale, but he took a liking to me the day I set foot in that school. Mark is also a football player and could probably beat up the rest of the team single handed. He’s popular, smart, and kind. The girls love him. In fact, I’m surprised he doesn’t have a girlfriend. The problem is that he likes to defend me. I have no idea why. I guess it’s his call if he wants to hang with a loser like me or not.
Anyway, I got in Mark’s pick-up and we headed down the road. I pointedly ignored him and kept my eyes on the floor. We drove in silence for a while, keeping to ourselves. Then Mark broke the silence.
“Penny for your thoughts.”
“I was just thinking about why you hang out with me.” I said looking up at him. I was surprised to see tears forming in his eyes. I quickly added, “If you don’t want to talk about it it’s OK.”
“No.” he said firmly. “You’ve got a right to know. I’ve kept Dale and his goons away from you for the past year for a reason. You’re smart, and I know how that is. I was sort of like you in middle school.”
I stared in shock. “You? That’s impossible.”
“No it’s not.” He said shaking his head. “I was the nerd in middle school. I wasn’t tall or strong. In fact, I was the shortest and weakest kid there. Everyone picked on me. All I had to fight with was my brain. I got straight As on everything. I would sit in my room and read all afternoon during the school year. I didn’t have any friends.
“Then came high school. The teasing in middle school had driven me crazy. I had a short temper and blew up every time someone even mentioned teasing me. It got really bad. I finally tried to convince my parents to take me out of school, but with both of them working full time, it wouldn’t have worked.
“So I found different ways of taking it out on the guys who picked on me. I tried to do something to hurt them back. I had a plan in place, but I left it out of my sight for an instant and a teacher saw it. He took it and asked me to see him in his office after class. I was spooked. My plan might’ve even broken some laws.
“Anyway, I talked with him about what was going on. He offered to help me stop people from bullying me. I was reluctant to accept his help, but finally did. I broke down and told him the whole story. Over the next couple of months, he helped me walk through everything and get a grip on myself.”
“Did it work?” I asked curious.
“Yeah.” Mark smiled. “It worked all right. It didn’t hurt that I grew almost four inches between my sophomore and junior year either.” He chuckled. “That took the football players by surprise. You should’ve seen their faces begging me to join the team. It was almost hysterical.”
As we began pulling into the driveway of my house, Mark said, “Dan, I know what you’re going through. I’ve been there. Let me give you a piece of advice. Don’t lash out. Forgive. The guys who tease and bully you probably have it rough out there somewhere. This is their way of taking it out. Don’t follow their example. There are better ways of getting rid of that frustration. Do something with it. Write it out; draw it; I don’t know. Don’t keep it bottled up inside. One day it’ll blow up and you could get yourself in trouble.”
I stared down at the dashboard. I knew that what Mark was saying made sense. I just couldn’t bring myself to figure out how to deal with it. I didn’t have any skills but my brain to use. What could I do to let out the anger I felt toward Dale and company?
“Actually, I have an idea.” Mark said, interrupting my thoughts. He reached around behind him and rummaged through the backseat. “Here.” he said handing me an old beat up notebook. “This was my way of letting it out. Go ahead. Read it. Maybe you’ll get an idea from it. I’ll warn you, it’s not pretty handwriting, but it’s legible.”
I took it reverently. “Thanks.” I didn’t know what else to say.
“You’re welcome.” Mark smiled again. “You know what? Keep it. I don’t need it back. Maybe it’ll help you help someone else in the future.”
“You sure?” I asked.
“Positive. Now get those ingredients to your mom.”
I looked down at the notebook and back up at Mark smiling. “You bet!”
I stepped out of the truck and waited until he’d backed out and started driving away before walking inside. I cradled the notebook like a newborn baby and lugged the ingredients to my mother. When I got to the kitchen, I took a deep breath, ready for the blast of hot air coming my way. My mom looked up when I opened the door.
“Who was that who drove you home?” she asked.
“A guy from school.” I said. “A friend.”
“That was nice of him.” She said.
I nodded and handed her the goods. I refilled my cup of iced tea and walked out to the front porch glass in one hand, notebook in the other. Once I got settled in the hammock, I opened the crisp pages. Mark’s name was the only thing on the first page. I turned the page and started reading.
“It was a warm sunny day.” it began. I smiled and read the rest of the notebook.
That was what got me started on the path to healing. I hope it’s the same for you, whoever you are. The advice Mark gave me was the best I’d received in a long time. Listen to it. It’s solid.
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